Trust
We have all heard it said, “In God I have put my trust, I shall not be afraid. What can man do to me?” (Psalm 56:11) This is a difficult fear to tackle–the fear of what man might do. But perhaps it is more difficult to put our trust in God, fearing what God might do. I mean, after all, everything we have seen and known and experienced tells us power corrupts. What does that mean for an all-powerful God? Can we put our trust in an all-powerful God, and still feel safe? We don’t like the idea of too much power belonging to one person. I believe many people are afraid to put their trust in God because of what God might do–afraid His power will corrupt him.
I am convinced the best way to remedy fears is to cling to the promises of God. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:5-6 If your understanding of the universe tells you power corrupts, and thus you are finding it difficult to trust God, then you are not following this verse. “Do not lean on your own understanding,” it says. Go ahead, trust in the Lord with all your heart, it is safe. He will make your paths straight.
Masculinity and Femininity
Why have so many women throughout history wished they were men? Ever wished yourself? At one point I found myself wishing this very thing. After struggling to resolve the matter and get to the root of it, I will attempt to put down in words many of the thoughts that were born.
1 Corinthians 11:7b-9 “[man] is the image and glory of God; but the woman is the glory of man. For man does not originate from woman, but woman from man; for indeed man was not created for the woman’s sake, but woman for the man’s sake.”
Does this mean women are a copy of a copy? Who are men made for? God? “But I want to be made for God, not for man.” What does this mean for me in heaven? Though men and women are coheirs, will men inherit more–more of God’s love and heart–than women (who were made for men)? When in glory, will I be left wanting, unfulfilled, unsatisfied because more of the love of God was given to men?
How can I, as a woman, relate to my masculine God? What is femininity, and where do I look for an example of its perfection? Certainly not to God. He is masculine; the most masculine there ever was or ever will be. Men have their example of true masculinity in God, but where am I to find the ultimate example? After being extremely frustrated with these questions, it dawned on me one day that men are in the same dilemma. After all, both believing men and believing women are the bride of Christ. So where do men look for an example of pure femininity?
Now, while I don’t reduce femininity or masculinity to this, I believe at the core of femininity is the act of being filled and at the core of masculinity is the act of filling. So how can I relate to my masculine God? By being filled up. And the same goes for believing men. Christ is the groom-He fills. We are the bride-we are filled. The bride of Christ will have achieved true femininity when she is filled with Christ and all He has to give.
Romans 15:13 “Now may the God of hope fill you…”
In response to the earlier questions, the answer lies in the truth that to be feminine means to be fulfilled. Christ fulfilled. I will be fulfilled. Though I, a woman, was made for man, I will receive as much satisfaction from God as men.
Psalm 17:15 “As for me, I shall behold Your face in righteousness; I will be satisfied with Your likeness when I awake.”
Suffering
“…mortals misunderstand. They say of some temporal suffering, ‘No future bliss can make up for it,’ not knowing that heaven, once attained, will work backwards and turn even that agony into a glory.” C.S. Lewis-The Great Divorce
A friend reminded me of this great quote from a book I read years ago.
Miscarriage
I recently gave birth to my fourth child (second miscarriage). I was five months pregnant. It was our first daughter and we named her Bethany.
When I went into labor the baby had no heartbeat and was pronounced dead. I was in labor for two days and had plenty of time to consider. I have honestly weighed the matter and can think of few things more difficult than laboring for a dead baby. Enduring labor pains and leaving the hospital empty-handed is miserable and utterly tragic. Pregnancy is not my “cup of tea,” but it is more than made up for with the fruit and joy of a child in the end. However, my pregnancy would have no such joyful ending. As I drew near to delivery, I felt a deep empathy for the trees, the grass, the sun. What anticipation they must feel. All of creation is also in the midst of birth pains. How tragic it would be if the end of the age were a miscarriage! Creation would have endured such futility and agony for a fruitless and joyless end. But this cannot be, for there will be a Son. And He is alive. Jesus is coming!
So, let us push, you and I, and bring forth the end. Then we shall rest.
